Sexting – defined by Wikipedia as a “a portmanteau of sex and texting” – is a term that covers some broad territory, from spicy messages to a significant other to naked pictures to a potential sex partner. Sometimes it can seem like the domain of the very people who shouldn’t do it – teenagers – but there’s no reason we adults can’t take over the game (we did it with Halloween). Whether you’re still a small screen virgin or an old hand, so to speak, at cellular smut, here are a few tips on how to have some wicked fun with that little keyboard:
- Go with who you know
Sexting your partner is great but it could be a huge turn-off if the boundaries of the relationship are unclear. This AARP story tells of a gentleman who got a graphic photo from a potential date and was totally turned off by the experience. Wait until you get a good idea of whether your advances will be welcome and don’t charge right out of the gate with nude pictures. Words, flirty and dirty, can go a long way.
- Use the new medium for new things
“Single Minded Women” writer Ereka Vetrini advises in her sexting guide to “Open Up” and use the keyboard to let you make suggestions you might be shy to speak out loud: “Push the envelope gently, and escalate your expressiveness according to his response.” You could also send them a web address or photo – of you or something out of a magazine or off the web – that speaks volumes for you.
- Surprises are hot
Reading “I love your body,” when he or she is at work can be like a type written painkiller in the middle of a trying day and can provide a little shot of confidence – who doesn’t feel more certain if they feel sexier?
- So is sneakiness
You and your partner are out with friends. You go to the bar for drinks and take a second to text him or her back at the table. “I’m not wearing underwear.” You’ll be out of there within the hour.
- Long distance connection
When a partner is far away a sexting marathon can make you feel like you’re not alone….because you’re not.
- Romance still counts.
I’ll never forget being in a sexting volley with my IC (It’s complicated) and, just when things were getting seriously smutty he wrote “I’m thinking about your eyes.” I was cloud-walking for days.
- Don’t leave them hanging.
If your honey does you the courtesy of sexting you text them back as soon as you can, even if it’s just to let them know you got it. “Can’t talk, xoxox, THANK YOU” will do if you’re in a meeting or otherwise engaged, but send something asap. Don’t put them through the terror of having to check the number to make sure they didn’t send a picture of their butt to a colleague by accident.
About Liz Langley
Liz Langley is a freelance writer whose work has appeared in about 20 publications – to see more go to www.lizlangley.com